Is there a ghost from your past that is stopping you moving forwards? Does your past dominate your life? Are you stuck reliving past mistakes?
For example, do you sometimes feel you can’t move on because of your difficult upbringing? Or that if only you’d had more support when young your life now would be easier?
Have you been turned down for a senior post and decided that you want to stay put?
Are you allowing your past to hold you back, using it as a shield to play safe?
If the answer to any of those questions is yes, do read on.
It’s Never Too Late To Change
I firmly believe it’s never too late to try and create the life you want. Just start now – whatever the circumstances of your past. People have survived horrendous life events and in spite of that, (or maybe because of that), gone onto do amazing things with their lives.
Epictetus Got It Right
You cannot change what has happened to you in the past. But there can be many interpretations of what has actually happened. Just ask any two siblings within a family: their interpretations of family dynamics are likely to be very different, yet both will believe they have the true version.
You cannot change actual events but you can change how you respond to them, how you interpret them. You can take control of how the events of the past impact on your current life. If it’s been traumatic it will take time and professional help. I’m talking about slightly less serious events that we have made part of our story which ‘allows’ us to be risk averse, to stay put. Or to stay ‘stuck’ in a less than ideal situation.
We are not touched so much by life events themselves but by the view we choose to take of them.
Epictetus
Note that word ‘choose’.
Change Isn’t Easy But It Can Be Exhilarating
Every time you decide to do something different you’re making a change. Most if us resist change as an auto response and people around us often help us ‘resist’. But this is a change of your own choosing. You’re choosing to take a different view of your past.
Always aim high. If you give yourself low expectations you’ll probably not be disappointed. But set yourself high and worthwhile aims and you may discover more about yourself than you ever imagined possible.
If you find your past coming back to haunt you, if you hear that nagging voice in your head telling you you can’t do it, take a look at this longer article. Try out the exercise contained within it, and aim to put the past where it belongs- behind you.
Top Photo by Lucian Andrei on Unsplash. Second from Getty Images
RenewYou, My Tried and Tested Career Booster!
RenewYou has helped thousands of women make positive and lasting change in their lives. I deliver it one-to-one as part of a bespoke coaching package for women looking to move into leadership, to progress their career, or who wish to be the absolute best version of themselves.
Posted on August 14th, 2023 by Jane
