Are You Feeling Lost?
It’s a rare woman who gets through life without feeling that sometimes. Maybe ‘feeling lost’ is too strong a description for you. It might just be a vague sense of something isn’t right. Or you may know that you are in the wrong job, or negative relationship, but can’t see a way out. You might just be feeling a tad discombobulated with life? (I love that word… so much more fun than just saying ‘confused’.)
So here’s my question to you.
How long since you last wrote a letter?
How Long Since You Last Wrote A Letter?
I know; you now think I’m losing my marbles but stay with me here. I don’t mean an email, I mean a real letter on proper paper using a proper pen. Like the photo above.
Writing things down can be a really helpful way of working out any issues. It will help you identify issues. Putting pen to paper can be very healing. It can help you generate new ideas. I’ve used it in therapeutic and coaching settings for decades and it almost always helps.
On my RenewYou course participants sometimes write a letter to themselves. I collect them up and post them out three months later. That timing is deliberate. We know it takes about three months for the full effect of the day to begin to make an impact. I can’t post your letter but we can still get the impact.
If You’re Feeling Lost Do This
Now, I’m going to be a bit radical here and suggest that you go to a shop. Yes, an actual shop, not on line. If you can find the time (and I know that can be tricky) get yourself to a stationery shop. Wallow in its delights. (It’s not just me that goes all bonkers for stationery, is it? I especially loved stationery cupboards…ooh) Take time to look around. Really enjoy the process of choosing.
You need some gorgeous paper and a beautiful pen. One that feels good in your hand. Try them out. You can even buy some coloured crayons to doodle a fabulous design all over your paper before writing. It all helps get your creative juices flowing.
When you have some head-space take yourself to a quiet spot with a cup of something you like. Get comfortable. Now write. This is just for you, no one else.
Write Your Letter
This letter is to you. Importantly it is a you who is full of compassion for yourself. No criticisms. No ‘I should have’ or ‘I ought to’. No judgements while you write. This is just for you. Be kind to yourself.
You are going to think back over the last couple of years. Record and review what’s happened to you in various areas of your life. The aim is to identify, if possible, why the ‘lost’ feeling has emerged. Try not to get stuck in sad memories. Acknowledge them, respect them, and then move on. Don’t put pressure on yourself to come up with a solution. It may happen immediately, or it might happen weeks down the line. You are unique. I can’t predict how you will respond.
Dear Me,
I’m feeling a bit lost and I’m not sure why so I’m writing to you for some advice...You know me best
You could try using the following headings, or add your own:
Career
Love
Relationships
Home
Hobbies
Friends
Jot down what you currently love and appreciate about these areas of your life.
Take some time to reflect. Now add what you might like to bring in to these areas of your life.
Try These Coaching Questions
Which area is most important to you right now?
What one thing could you do to improve your quality of life in this area?
Who or what do you need to make this happen?
When does it need to happen by?
Is there anything stopping you doing something about this?
What is the smallest thing you can do within the next seven days to move things along?
Do Good For Yourself And Others
I’m currently coaching on line, with all proceeds going to charity. You can read more about it here. Please do share with others. Thank you SO much!
RenewYou, My Tried and Tested Career Booster!
RenewYou has helped thousands of women make positive and lasting change in their lives. I deliver it one-to-one as part of a bespoke coaching package for women looking to move into leadership, to progress their career, or who wish to be the absolute best version of themselves.
Posted on February 25th, 2026 by Jane
