How To ‘Love’ The Job You Hate!

Hopefully, you are in a role that you find fulfilling and worthwhile. But if you’re not this will help you to love the job you hate. I’ve coached hundreds of women at various points in their careers. Sometimes people come to me to forward plan; they love their jobs but know that they want to progress. But, sometimes they are really unhappy in their current role. Remedial action is called for.

I don’t do formulaic coaching or subscribe to one style; every woman is unique. So I listen hard to what they want from our sessions and plan them individually.

How To Love The Job You Hate & Appreciative Inquiry

That said, I do have some guiding principles and one of those is the theory behind Appreciative Inquiry. Do click the link to read more, but in brief, Appreciative Inquiry means try to shift the focus onto what is actually working. It’s a good way to look at life. Even when all seems hopeless there will be parts of your life that are functioning well. If you work out what those are it will let you know what you don’t want to lose when you make a change.

If you’re really unhappy at work this exercise should help you find it bearable. It may not be true ‘love’ but it might be enough of a crush to allow the headspace to find something better.

Try for three now. Three things that really work well for you in your current role. It may be proximity to home. Or it may be working hours. Perhaps it’s particular colleagues? Focusing on the positive lifts the emphasis from the negative and stops it becoming all consuming.

But I Still Hate My Job…

However, when I’m coaching or running seminars, women frequently tell me they are really unhappy with their jobs. It’s difficult to move on until we’ve both heard what’s causing that. Finding the positives is sometimes a step too far. If that’s you, try this. Try to really understand what you don’t like about your current job. Be as detailed as possible.

Here’s an extract from a chapter in my ebook Dream Big (aka When Work Isn’t Working and currently only £4.99), designed to help you do just that.

Be very specific as this is important. If, when you have answered these questions, it seems that certain people loom large and unpleasant in your working life then you need to consider if a change of career is what you really want. It might just be a change of employer or department.

The Hit List

List as many things as you can in relation to what you don’t like. You could go really vintage and use pen and paper. The slower pace will aid your thinking.

The following questions will help your process:

Is it the task, the actual work you have to do?

Perhaps it’s the ethics of the organisation? Do the values of the organisation match your values?

Are you happy with the pay/salary or bonus scheme?

Is it lack of prospects?

Is it too much emphasis on advancement?

Do you feel a  lack of  encouragement and opportunities for your development in the role?

Could it be the attitude of other workers?

What are your feelings on your manager?

Does the location have a negative impact?

Do you find the role too easy or undemanding for you?

Conversely, is it too much of a stretch for you at this point in your life?

Take the time to answer each of these questions in turn, being specific about the role you have now. Give as full an answer as you can. Your answers will be giving you some really useful information. Now you should have a much better idea of what it is you want to change.

Your next step is to make those changes…

Dream Big is my ebook which contains more exercises like this. It’s currently on sale at only £4.99!

RenewYou, My Tried and Tested Career Booster!

RenewYou has helped thousands of women make positive and lasting change in their lives. I deliver it one-to-one as part of a bespoke coaching package for women looking to move into leadership, to progress their career, or who wish to be the absolute best version of themselves.

Posted on November 17th, 2023 by Jane