Does having a good friend at work make you feel better about your job?
Yes, it probably does.
In a survey commissioned by Gallop of what makes a great workplace, having a best friend at work came in at number 10 in the top 12.
I have always smiled at this as this was a survey of 80,000 managers, and management can be very lonely. I don’t have a gender breakdown for it but I know when I’m running my women’s courses that women are happy to admit to this fact. For senior women it can be extremely isolating as often there are fewer women in similar positions; they can find themselves carrying the flag for all women’s issues in an organisation.
Fight/Flight Is Different For Women
I think women in particular may value friendships at work because of our unique responses to stress. Although we also have the surge of adrenalin that prepares us to run away or stand and fight, we have a third coping mechanism when feeling under stress. Women release oxytocin, the ‘love hormone’ which is released during childbirth to promote bonding.
Women Need Friends More Than Men
It seems we women may have an actual physiological need for friendship. This differentiates us from men. Men definitely go into fight/flight mode when faced with something threatening, like a change at work. Yet, when I used to run change seminars, managers, mainly men, would tell me women talked too much about it. They perceived this talk as an inability to accept the changes afoot. Which it isn’t. Women talk ‘threats’ through to manage their anxiety. It often irritated the men, a classic example of male behaviour being regarded as the norm in workplaces.
Workplaces can be very stressful places so no wonder friendships score highly.
Try This Personal Development Exercise
Try and take a few moments out of your busy day to consider the following:
- Do you have a best friend at work?
- How important are your friendships to you in managing the stresses and strains of life?
- Are you paying enough attention to your friendships(Check out Should You Audit Your Mates?)
You can let me know what you think on Twitter, I’d love to connect.
RenewYou, My Tried and Tested Career Booster!
RenewYou has helped thousands of women make positive and lasting change in their lives. I deliver it one-to-one as part of a bespoke coaching package for women looking to move into leadership, to progress their career, or who wish to be the absolute best version of themselves.
Posted on November 8th, 2021 by Jane
