No, I’m not suggesting that you combat femageism by getting a facelift or anything so ridiculous. You are gorgeous! Revel in all your hard won lines and wrinkles.
However, being discriminated against because of your age is something that affects women more than men. I know of women who are terrified that their age will become public and that somehow they will be seen as ‘less than’.
Ageism, as defined by author and activist Ashton Applewhite, “occurs when a dominant group uses its power to oppress or exploit or silence or simply ignore people who are much older or significantly younger. We experience ageism any time someone assumes we’re ‘too old’ for something – a task, a relationship, a haircut-instead of finding out who we are and what we’re capable of.”
I have defined another type of agesim. Femageism.
What is Femageism?
Femageism is ageism plus. It’s that special category reserved for women which can start any time in our forties. Just think about TV presenters for a moment. How many times have you seen a man and a woman on the couch with the man being significantly older than the woman? Quite a few times, I’d guess.
As men age they are seen as having wisdom and experience. It’s nowhere near as much as a barrier to progression for men.
Femageism is being bombarded with messages about how awful it is to grow old so we must buy expensive creams. Try to keep the figure we had in our twenties. Although we must be careful not to be ‘mutton dressed as a lamb” or the wrath of the media descends upon us. We must do everything possible to disguise the fact that we are older women.
Why? Because older women have no value.
What a big mistake.
Older Women Are a Massive Resource
As an older woman you have masses of experience yet the attitudes to being an older worker can combine to silence us. You are hugely valuable and employers ignore us at their peril.
All women are talked over in meetings, ignored, have their ideas stolen. Check out Where do men get the credit but women don’t. (Snappy title, I know…) As we age this increases.
So, here’s my tip for this post. Speak up in every meeting you attend. Not to put anyone down, or talk across anyone, but to show your huge breadth of experience. Do not be cowed or brainwashed into keeping quiet. If you need to, get some coaching, or do an assertiveness class.
All of us stand on the shoulders of women who came before us. You are the shoulders for young women in your organisation. They need to stand on yours. Show them who you are. Show them your experience, Be their role model. Repeat after me, older women are fabulous!
RenewYou, My Tried and Tested Career Booster!
RenewYou has helped thousands of women make positive and lasting change in their lives. I deliver it one-to-one as part of a bespoke coaching package for women looking to move into leadership, to progress their career, or who wish to be the absolute best version of themselves.
Posted on November 4th, 2022 by Jane
