We all know that women have had to face extra hurdles throughout their lives to progress upwards. If you’re in your fifties or sixties you will have been subjected to a type of sexism which today would be unthinkable. Unthinkable overtly that is. I call it femageism, that particular brand of discrimination reserved for women over a certain age. Despite changes in attitudes and legislation, the idea that somehow women offer less than a man is still pervasive. It’s just not said very openly now, and can be challenged if it is.
Older women are exhorted to stay looking young. And we’re applauded for doing so. How utterly patronising. Look at any chat show and the host may say, well you’re looking fabulous for 65. Cue hysterical reaction from the audience. Cue long and loud rant at TV from me…
But if somehow you haven’t managed to not to look your age, and wear your years and hard earned wisdom with pride, you are castigated, or ignored, or pitied. This is not just men; women do this to each other because we’ve all been brainwashed.
Which makes it unsurprising that older women can feel that cloak of invisibility descend upon them.
Older Women Are Less Appealing to Employers?
Let’s tackle this myth. Are older women unappealing to employers? Well, yes, to some unenlightened employers that may be the case. But more savvy ones are realising that a diverse workforce is crucial in today’s world. Diversity includes age. Lose us at your peril, employers.
When I had a proper job (ie one where you get paid if you’re off sick) I lived through multiple reorganisations. Even the memory makes me shudder.
Each time older staff were encouraged to leave, some with attractive packages or enhanced pensions, keeping younger, less experiences and cheaper staff. All that knowledge and history disappeared with the older workers. It soon became apparent that a mix is required.
An Antidote Exercise to Femageism
Do not be bamboozled into thinking that because you forget a word now and again (your mind is just full up with decades of experience and learning so it takes longer to sift through) that you are past it. You are SO NOT PAST IT! (Sorry for shouting but I’m a bit passionate on this topic.)You have masses to offer the world of work. I mean it, you are a catch!
Try this exercise.
Take a sheet of paper and plenty of coloured crayons. Do this very consciously. I want you to use real paper and pens, not an app. It works better, trust me. You can release your inner child and choose scented pencils, or watercolours, or glitter pens. Go mad in a stationery shop. I frequently use colour on my courses and when coaching ,because it opens our minds and helps us think differently. And it’s fun! Although my courses have a serious intent, I hope they are always fun.
Now you have your materials, ponder a while on all the changes you have experienced in your life. Some will be personal and some will be more macro. In my life, for example, I’ve seen a change in currency, man on the moon, the pill, HRT, internet, cordless phones, Sat Nav, female priests, streaming music, for example. I’ve experienced the death of loved ones. I’ve had children. And I’ve become a carer, I set up my own business, I’ve studied numerous courses… Once you start it’s hard to stop. You are so much more talented than you realise.
Blocks or Free Flowing?
You may find this easier to do in blocks of decades, or just let it go free flow. Once you have a list, (at least 30 things should be on it), pause and wonder at just how much change you have experienced and survived. And yet people think growing older means we can’t change? Piffle! We’re experts at it. Use the colour how you like but you can differentiate by underlining personal, professional or societal in different colours.
Think back to how you managed those changes.
Managing that much change means you have acquired masses of skills and attributes. List those now. Do not be modest!
Now pull out from that list those skills and attributes which make you attractive to an employer. Rewrite your CV full of newfound confidence. While you’re at it, sit up straight and smile because there is some research to show that this will make you sound more positive.
Femageism – The Curse of The Older Woman
I’m currently researching and trialling anew course called, at least for now, Femageism: The Curse of the Older Woman. You can read that ‘curse’ how you wish and we will be discussing witches and how society has traditionally feared the intelligence of older women (for society read men in power…). This is number one in a series of articles about being a thriving older woman, so please bookmark the website or sign up to the newsletter if you’re interested. Let me know about your experiences, too. If you’d like to attend a future course, please get in touch.
RenewYou, My Tried and Tested Career Booster!
RenewYou has helped thousands of women make positive and lasting change in their lives. I deliver it one-to-one as part of a bespoke coaching package for women looking to move into leadership, to progress their career, or who wish to be the absolute best version of themselves.
Posted on October 31st, 2022 by Jane
