Change Your Future with This Simple Exercise

When you look back, what will you see? Will you be looking back in anger, sorrow, or joy?

The future is yours to create, right now.

Your Personal Development Exercise

Take a few moments to imagine yourself five or ten years from now. You’re sitting in a cafe, with a friend and you’re both reminiscing. Maybe you have a glass of chilled wine, or a mug of coffee or a cup of tea.

You’re really happy with what you’ve achieved over these last few years. You listen contentedly to your friend describing her life and now it’s your turn. What are you going to say? What do you want to see when you look back and share some significant events in your life? What would make you proud of yourself?

Focus for a few moments on the following key areas in your life and consider what, if anything, you want to change:

• Significant Others?
• Career?
• Where you live?
• Friends or family?
• Places you have visited?
• Hobbies or pastimes?
• Add your own…

What do you have to do now, this week, this month or this year to make those reflections become a reality? To allow yourself to look back in JOY, to be proud, content and fulfilled in your life?

Photo Credit: Ivan Freaner

A Job You Love?

“Find a job you love and you’ll never work a day in your life.” So said Confucious and I who am I to disagree with him? I love my job - I have created the job of my dreams! First, of course, I had to work out what my dream job was!

I have loved other jobs in my time. And when I haven’t loved my job I’ve tried to find something loveable about it until I was able to get another. As long as I’ve had enough to pay the bills money has never been a great motivator for me. It rarely is. Money is no substitute if you hate your job, not in the longer term. And in work satisfaction surveys  money never comes top. It’s usually there, but it’s not number one.

Job of Your Dreams

You may not have found the job of your dreams yet; but don’t stop looking. And let’s not beat about the bush. It’s bloomin’ hard in the current economic climate to make changes. Great jobs are few and far between.

You can get ahead of the game though. Try not to be despondent and down hearted. Things will change. I know it feels like you can’t change anything yourself, and of course, that’s true on one level. But you can change how you react to what to what is happening in the external world. And don’t underestimate the power of your thinking in helping you make effective, lasting and positive change in your life. Along with actually doing something, of course!

Here’s one exercise to try to help you start preparing for your next move, and help you gain some control over your work situation.

• Grab hold of some kind of box, and if you wish cover it with images of work which inspire and motivate you. This is your ‘ideas and inspiration’ box and it’s a tangible reminder that you’re taking back some control.
• Start looking for jobs which you like the look of, in newspapers or on the internet. At this stage you’re not going to apply for them so they can be anywhere in the world. Don’t be constrained about meeting the requirements. Nothing is out of your league for this exercise. Go as high or low in salary and seniority as you like.
• Cut out/print off as many of them as you can and don’t censor yourself
• Collect all your cuttings together in your box
• Once you’ve got a good collection together read through them all at one sitting. Is a theme emerging? What is the common denominator? Are they ‘telling’ you something about your values? Is there an indication there that you need to add a qualification or two? Is that possible?

Once you’ve answered some of those questions you’ll have a good idea of what you next move might be, and you can start to make plans accordingly.

I have another exercise here which might help. And take a listen to my free audio download which you get immediately by clicking this link.

If you’d like some help and support making positive change in your life take a look at my 3Qi package. We can chat informally to see if it’s for you (01761 438749). And I’d love to know how you’ve found your dream job. Or if you’re still looking, what helps you through the daily grind?

Photo Credit: Sanja Gjenero

Shift Your Butt Day!

I love my job and one of the perks is that I get to know some amazing women and occasionally get given some great books to read. Professor Karen Pine combined the two; we did a fab interview together (click here to read it), and ever since she has sent me her books.  I have reviewed a couple of them*,  and others I often use when working directly with women.

I was reminded of the ‘Shift Your Butt’ exercise yesterday when running an in house seminar. I laughingly suggested that participants could try sitting somewhere else in the room after the break. Of course, they didn’t want to and resolutely stayed put. People rarely do. We get comfortable with our situation very quickly and even if we don’t much like the view, at least we know it!

Which is fine sometimes but resolutely staying put doesn’t lead to a life of growth, development and discovery. And more fun!

So, for one day only, why don’t you try the ‘Shift Your Butt’ Exercise?

Today, don’t sit anywhere you would normally sit. Whether it’s at the dining table, at work, watching TV or in a meeting, see the world from a different place.

Go on, give it a go! See what happens and do let me know.

*One of Karen’s books is reviewed here - Sheconomics .  You can read my book policy here but briefly if I don’t think books are helpful to you I don’t talk about them. I have a shelf full of books which didn’t make my grade.

Photo Credit: Juliane Riedl

If You’re a Short Woman, over 50, & Your Parents Didn’t Go to University….

…then I’m sorry to have to tell you but  you’re probably very risk averse! And here’s why:

In 2004 a validated survey of over 22,000 individuals was taken to determine attitudes to risk taking with money. The analysis reveals several facts:

(1) Women are less willing to take risks than men, at all ages;

(2) Increasing age is associated with decreasing willingness to take risks;

(3) Taller individuals are more willing to take risks;

(4) Individuals with highly-educated parents are more willing to take risks.

Speaking as a 5ft 3inch (and almost a half) woman over 50 whose parents didn’t go to University can this be true? Am I risk averse?

The Institute for Leadership and Management also tells us women are risk averse too and this may account for why we don’t progress onto boards etc. Maybe so but there are a myriad other reasons too.

The implications are that being risk averse is a bad thing (psst, can I just throw in five words here -western world financial melt down).

Maybe definitions of risk are very male? Maybe the female of the species has a different idea of what constitutes a risk? Maybe we are good at evaluating possible negative outcomes? Maybe having babies makes us more protective? (But surely that would be true of chaps too?)

Your Views

Tell me what you think? When did you last take a risk? What constitutes risky behaviour for you? Do you take risks at work? In your experience are you less risk averse than your male counterparts? If so, what do you think possible solutions could be?

Photo Credit by Sanja Gjenaro

You Can Talk to Yourself!

An odd little email plopped into my box the other day. It said: “Now you know this works you can tell everyone about it”.

I thought it was a particularly clever advertising campaign, well maybe a too clever by half campaign, as I couldn’t work out what it was advertising!

And then I realised it was an email I had sent myself a year ago. I’m not actually as mad as a box of frogs but I have discovered Futureme.org, and now I know it works I can tell you about it! (And I’m not being sponsored to do this – it’s a free service).

Keep Motivated

When I’m running my Renewyou course I give participants the offer of sending themselves a motivational letter which I post on at an agreed time. But now I also offer them the opportunity to use futureme to send themselves more frequent reminders of their intentions and to keep themselves on track.

Try it out and while you’re there take a look at some of the ‘open’ messages. Some are heartbreakingly sad and some are very amusing; here’s one example:

Of course, you never get to know the answers and can only wonder what actually happened.  But rest assured, you don’t have to make your email public. You can choose to tick the public or private box.

What would you write to yourself about?

Photo Credit: Julian Tromeur

Women Together – A Class Act

I have just finished one of my Renewyou courses at a great hotel in Bristol. I am very tired but very happy and energised at one and the same time. What a wonderful collection of women I have just had the privilege of spending a day with.

There really is something magical about a group of women all working together to support and help each other. It truly plays to our strengths; the feeling of trust, caring and respect that was engendered was almost palpable.

I wish some of those people who tell me women are ‘bitchy’ and ‘uncooperative’ together could have seen the magic that happened yesterday. Of course, everyone had a common purpose, to make a positive change in their lives, but already I’ve had enough comments from them to know that something else happened. There was a generosity of spirit that will reward both the givers and receivers. These are not women who will be pulling up the ladder behind them but reaching out to help other women.

So to all you women who were with me yesterday in Bristol, I sincerely thank you. It was a very special day for me too. I wish you success in all your endeavours. I know you will be fabulous!

“One’s prime is elusive. You little girls, when you grow up, must be on the alert to recognize your prime at whatever time of your life it may occur.” Murial Spark in The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie.

RenewYou Women, you are most definitely in your prime now! Grab it with both hands!

Women’s friendships are important.

Photo Credit: West Suburban -Women’s friendship group