Help! I need you!

Thanks for responding! I’m not drowning, but I would very much appreciate your help with a new project I’m planning, if you’re up for it?

If you’re a regular reader of the blog or newsletter, have been coached by me, or attended any of my courses, you will know that I work with tried and tested techniques. No gimmicks and no mad acronyms. Everything I do is based on:

• years of experience of working with others to help them achieve their best,

• respected research,

• my  own continuing studies and evaluations received.

Similarly, my book is full of exercises I have successfully used over the years which I know work for people.

When I launch a new course I test it out first by offering it for free to specially selected groups (i.e. not my friends!), with follow up questionnaires as to effectiveness;  my coaching is based on the professional training I have received and many years of experience.

The Project

My  Renewyou programme has proved itself time and time again to help people make positive CHANGE in their lives. The drawback is I can only deliver it to a limited number of people at any one time …… up until now!

In response to requests from readers unable to attend my seminars in person, I have begun work on turning it into a download/workbook with audio so anyone can do it anytime, anywhere in the world.

Now you know I only deal in what works. I know the Renewyou seminar works because of the many testimonials I have received and because of the feed back from organisations who send staff to it. But I want to know how the programme works in a different format.

User Panel

I am assembling a User Panel to try out (for free) various exercises from the programme and give me honest feed back as to how easy it was to follow, effectiveness, etc. I’m looking for a large cross selection of ages, gender, (this course has worked equally well for men too) nationalities, and backgrounds.

If you are interested in becoming part of my user panel please send me a few details about yourself – I will respond to every person who applies.

Thank you! I am really looking forward to hearing from you!

You’re Worth It!

Are you really good at setting yourself goals and targets but then seem to find yourself falling short?

There are probably many reasons but one of them may be that you are focussing too much on very practical goals, for example:

‘I will lose 14 pounds by December‘.

Instead try thinking more about what you want to feel like in December. Why is losing 14 pounds important to you? Do you want to feel more attractive? Do you want to feel more healthy? Do you want to feel more confident?

Once you’ve worked out what the ‘feeling’ goal is implicit in your practical goal, try focussing on that and see what happens!

What tips/advice/techniques have you find useful in making sure you reach your goals?

Job or Career?

Having a job is not the same as having a career; you will have very different feelings about a job, usually its just a means to an end. Jobs come and go and can disappear in an inkling, often for reasons well beyond your control.

A career is something you have for life (although you may have several careers in one lifetime!) A career is something YOU control.

I have had jobs (too numerous to mention!) and I have had three careers – as a professionally qualified social worker, as a manager, and now as a specialist in change.

A career is a lifetime experience of making the most of your skills, your knowledge and your life experiences. People with careers tend to read and study in their spare time and it doesn’t feel like drudgery. A career is something you develop and plan. Having a career that you love really does mean that work isn’t working!

It’s your life, your career. Don’t hold back from spending time thinking about and planning your career. It’s time well spent, whatever age you are! There will be knock backs along the way, and times when you leap ahead. But knowing what you want, having goals and milestones along the way, will ensure you get where you want to be and then help you stay there.

What has been the best move you have ever made to help you take charge of your career?

Inspirational Women- Maggie Philbin

I have followed the career of Maggie Philbin with interest for years so I’m especially pleased to bring you this interview with Maggie, a well known and much respected broadcaster. Read her story and be inspired to follow your own dream!

Jane: Maggie, you will be well known to many of our readers as the bright young thing on Saturday Swap Shop, voted by professionals as one of the most influential programmes ever, and later as the very knowledgeable presenter of Tomorrow’s World (incidentally a programme ahead of its time I’d say, in terms of how it presented women!)

But what aspirations did the young Maggie have? What did you want to be when you ‘grew up’?
Maggie: My earliest ambition was to be a trapeze artist – very ambitious when you consider I wasn’t the best co-ordinated child and also rather fat! After that I think I had impresario tendencies, rounding up the village kids and staging a puppet show when I was about 9. The profit margin was HUGE – I managed to earn two years worth of pocket money in as many hours. Sadly my parents forced me to give all the money to the local hospital.

Did you have a fairly standard path through school? Were there any early indications of the life you went onto lead?
I owe everything to a French teacher, Mrs Roberts, who joined my school the year of our GCE’s. Up until then I’d only shone at subjects which came naturally but saw no reason to any effort with others  She took me on one side and said, “You’re a bright girl, and there’s absolutely no reason for you to fail French.” She was the reason for an abrupt turn around in my academic life in every subject –and for the 3 As at A level (including French!)

I really loved Physics and Maths but didn’t get on with the Chemistry teacher who used to hurl board rubbers at me, with I’m sure every justification. So I didn’t apply for vet science or medicine – a decision that haunted me at Manchester University because I walked past the medical school every day.

Looking back, one of the things I really enjoyed was doing “sketches”, I loved making people laugh. But I never thought of myself as a performer. By the time I left school, I knew I needed to take a year off to decide what I wanted to do and my Dad was furious when I opted for English and Drama!

How did you end up on Swap Shop? (A Saturday morning TV programme aimed at older children, click here for link to BBC web site).
During my final year at Manchester, I saw a box numbered ad offering “The Chance of a Lifetime” to the successful applicant. I thought it was a bogus agent or a tiny TV company but writing a tongue in cheek reply was a good distraction from revising .To cut a long story short, it turned out to be Swap Shop and to my utter astonishment, they gave me the presenting job. My daughter is named after Rose, the woman who took such a huge risk on a student with no experience.

As a young woman who had the most influence on you, personally and professionally? And why?
I’ve mentioned Mrs Roberts – who taught me early on that it’s worth making an effort with things you think you can’t do, we create most of our own barriers. And Rosemary Gill, the Swap Shop editor, was undoubtedly one of the most talented women working in television, a great mentor to have when you’re starting out. After that I was lucky enough to work with Richard Reisz on Tomorrow’s World – a seriously clever man who absolutely believed in me and gave me the confidence to report live on some of the most complicated Science and Technology stories.

Do you have a mentor now, someone you really look up to and admire?
One of my closest friends is an executive producer, Sally Dixon. Sally keeps a very close eye on what I’m doing and constantly encourages me to think bigger. Every time we meet up for supper she has a list of things for me to think about. It’s really important to have a mentor – otherwise we can slip back into a “comfort zone” and lose sight of what we really want to achieve.

You were a presenter on Tomorrow’s World and still report on innovative technology. Is there one innovation that you think has had a really significant effect on the role of women in society?
You know I’m very enthusiastic about social media – it’s a very powerful connection tool and helps women to build strong networks. And any technology that helps women to work flexibly is great – When I held those early “mobile” phones on Tomorrow’s World, I never dreamed they’d become the “computer in your pocket”.

And if you could invent one, (no limits), what would it be?
Really convincing 3D haptic conferencing, to cut down on travel time to meetings – I loathe telephone conference calls.

Have you experienced femageism in TV? I’m talking about the tendency to have older mature male presenters matched with young female presenters. How do you think women can combat this? (Assuming you think it exists?)
You do still see the “avuncular” pairing of presenters and sometimes it makes me laugh out loud, it’s so cynical! That said, there are probably more older women on screen and on the radio now, than there were thirty years ago. But it’s all about figures… and if your face pulls in viewers, I don’t think broadcasters would care care if you were 120!

What’s the best piece of advice you have ever been given?
Keep it short.

How do you relax? Are you good at giving yourself time off?
I love music, film and food and I make plenty of time for all three.

What advice would you give to any woman looking for a career in the media, TV and or journalism?
Be the very best. Specialise. There’s a lot of competition

Maggie, thank you so much for taking time out of your busy schedule to talk with us. I know our readers will love your story. Thank you!

You can follow Maggie on Twitter @MaggiePhilbin and read her blog here

Are You Good Enough? 15 ways to build a confident mindset.

Are You Good Enough? is a compact paperback authored by Bill Mc Farlan & Dr Alex Yellowlees.  It sells at 8.99 and is published by Capstone.

The book has been written to act as confidence booster and by and large I think it achieves its purpose. It’s full of examples and stories based around an ‘ordinary’ couple who go on to explore their behaviour and values.

Here is an extract to give you an idea of style:

“In every moment, our own mind is either working for or against us. The choice is ours.

Lynn thinks back to her childhood, and how she struggled even then to make sense of her family, her environment, her ‘world’.

She now realises that, in so many ways, it didn’t add up at all.

Her mother praised her, irrespective of what she did – an dher father gave her no feedback whatsoever, neither good nor bad.

She recognises how impossible it was, as a child growing up in that specific setting, to construct a clear picture of a rational world.

Suddenly it dawns on her:

It’s impossible to build a sure sense of healthy self worth on sifting sands of inconsistent and conflicting parental messages.

No wonder Lynn has doubted herself so much and found compliments from Steve and her colleagues hard to believe. She still thinks, sometimes, that they are ‘just being nice’ to her by not telling her the truth.”

The book pulls no punches and digs deep but in an informal and very accessible style. Each chapter contains an analysis of the situation without being preachy or patronising. If you’re feeling a lack of confidence in your life I think this would be a good place to start! You can buy it at £6.74 via Amazon or get a copy from your local library.

Your 10 Minute Confidence Boost

One of the best ways to gain confidence is to try things out. The first time you try anything can be nerve wracking but the more often you do it, the more confident you get.

Which is fine when you have the time to develop and grow in confidence in this way. But what about when you have to get it right first time? Most of us, when lacking in confidence, tend to imagine the worst. We see ourselves getting it wrong in all manner of ways:

• tripping up as we sashay into the room
• throwing a glass of water over our interviewer
• burping as we lean in for THE kiss
• forgetting our speech
• accidentally tucking the back of our skirt into our knickers…you can add your own worst case scenario!

Be Confident!

Here’s a tip I share with my coaching clients. Sit down somewhere quiet and close your eyes. Listen to the pattern of your breathing, relax, and think through the situation where you want a confidence boost.

Banish all thoughts of disaster; instead mentally run through the scene in your head making yourself the star. You are absolutely brilliant. You don’t put a foot wrong, you are word perfect, immaculately groomed, and your knickers are well out of sight! The more detail that you can add the better the effect.  Focus only on it being a really good experience.

Do this on two or three occasions before the event itself. And when you need that quick confidence boost momentarily close your eyes, remember your visualising, and be wonderful!

What confidence building techniques have worked for you?