Businesswoman at work after important meeting where she felt ignored:
“I am so fed up. None of my ideas at work are ever taken seriously. I want to leave.”
Businessman at work, after an important meeting where he did not feel ignored but was irritated:
” I don’t understand why she had to ask so many questions. It’s as if she doesn’t agree with what I’m doing all the time. It makes everything take longer.”
Fact: men and women have different styles of communicating. Neither is right or wrong, they just are.
Women, generally, like to ask questions. The route is as important as the final destination. It does not mean they disagree.
Men, generally, dislike what they see as ‘unnecessary’ talk. The final outcome is where they are headed and that’s what matters most.
Women duet, men duel.
However, because working practices have evolved in a way men find most natural, women are usually the most disadvantaged. Men shouldn’t have to speak like women and women should not have to speak like men. Both need to better understand the other and then businesses will benefit. As will women’s careers when businesses adopt more gender neutral ways of operating. Win win all round I’d say.
It reminds me of the lyrics to an Elvis Presley song ‘A little less conversation.’ It could be the theme song of many a man at work and home. This is part of the first verse/chorus:
A little less conversation, a little more action please
All this aggravation ain’t satisfactioning me
A little more bite and a little less bark
A little less fight and a little more spark
No wonder the research shows men think women talk the most in meetings when actually it’s the men who generally hold sway. Interestingly, the women surveyed after the same meetings, also thought women talked the most too! A little more understanding, please…
I have a half day, light hearted, yet extremely effective workshop for both men and women on this very topic. I guarantee you will leave feeling enlightened and a better communicator, whatever your gender. Contact me for more information.
Photo Credit: Moi Cody.
Posted on June 24th, 2015 by Jane