I have to apologise right now if a slightly smug tone pervades this post. I don’t think I feel smug; I do feel very happy but you know, when you write things down it can sound wrong…
If you do, take it out and look at it from time to time. Now is a good time! Really examine your dream in from all angles and ask yourself the following questions:
- Is this really something I want to do or a means of escape from something I don’t like doing at the moment?
- If it’s something I really want to do what am I doing every day to make it happen?
- Do I know what steps I need to take in order to make my dream a reality?
- Do I use my dream to take refuge in from the rigours of everyday life?
- Can I close my eyes now and see myself living that dream?
Of all the women I meet who have achieved their dreams not one of them has won the lottery. Despite that often being the default answer, winning the lottery rarely makes unhappy people happy. Research shows a year later they are about as unhappy as they ever were, albeit in comfort.
What they have in common is that they have made their dreams a reality and they have worked very hard to get there. Luck rarely has had anything to do with it. They may have got ‘noticed’ at some stage but that’s because they have put themselves in a good place to take advantage of opportunities.
Their dreams have varied, from moving to France and becoming almost self sufficient (my ex PA, Vicki, did that), to making a real difference in the field of social care (my close friend, Sue, did that) to getting a qualification and taking themselves higher in their chosen field ( I know loads of women who have done that).
The point is you have to start somewhere and you have to do something.
Work out what your first step needs to be (looking up on line prices of houses in France and finding out what your house is worth, for example).
Make a plan, follow the plan (not slavishly, be flexible), mark off the small achievements and then one day you’ll realise you’ve done it! That is the way dreams can come true. You have to take charge of yourself.
And Why I Am So Happy?
Well, some time ago I had a dream of doing something much more helpful than the management role I was in. 10 years ago in fact (I didn’t say dreams happen overnight). I had begun my career as a social worker with a burning desire to help people, particularly women who I felt had much to contend with in our society. For a while I probably did help in some ways and ran groups for women in violent situations, in psychiatric hospital and so on, but as you progress it feels that the bureaucracy and organisational machine takes over. The ability to make a real difference felt like it was eluding me and I grew increasingly frustrated. As did many of my colleagues. In fact, it was quite comforting to just moan together about our lot and it made us a group. A group of moaners. And you know what happens when you do a lot of something? It gets bigger and assumes a greater importance than it should.
I didn’t only moan though. I’d written a paper about the lack of women in any senior posts in my organisation as part of a management qualification. That had blossomed into a women’s group which in turn meant that we accessed some training we might not otherwise have had as the organisation (all credit to them) took on the findings of the report.
With hindsight it was probably as a direct result of that report that I had the opportunity to do a residential course which gave me time to think about my career. I realised that little would change unless I made it change and that it was down to me to take control. For me, that control meant leaving the security of my job at age 48 and branching out on my own. When pushed, I admitted that my dream was to achieve a lifestyle where I had more time at home but was doing something meaningful to make people’s lives better. (I know, I sound like Pollyanna, but it’s true!)
In March of this year I began a new project to get my RenewYou course out to a million women! It sounds unachievable and on my own it certainly is ( I think I’ve managed a few hundred so far by myself) Last Monday I licensed 9 lovely women in central London to deliver that course and that brought my total to 27 excellent women across the UK personally trained by me to deliver RenewYou. I have another licensing event running in December in Bristol with 6 events scheduled for next year.
An unexpected bonus is the community of supportive women trainers we are creating. I am on top of the world; I am working with some great women and helping them to develop their own businesses by helping other women achieve their dreams ( I warned you this might sound smug!) If you’d told me 10 years ago this is where I’d be now I wouldn’t have believed you. I followed my own advice and I took charge.
And so can you.
Thinking of expanding your training business? Are you passionate about empowering women? I have a brilliant opportunity for you! To find out more, click here.
Posted on October 16th, 2013 by Jane