Blurting, we all do it from time to time when our mouths speak before our brain is engaged. For example:
‘Who was that ghastly bloke hanging on to you last week? He looked like a right old lech, did you manage to get rid of him….
Oh, he’s your fiancé? Of course, I was just joking- he looks like a lovely chap, no honestly…!’
I often work within larger organisations as a coach/mentor. Some time ago I was involved in sorting out an unfortunate attack of blurting which had serious consequences for all involved. In brief, two senior managers had an underlying issue which neither had tackled and had lain dormant. Most of their colleagues knew they ‘didn’t get on’ but the real problem had never been addressed.
Say What You Mean – But Don’t be Mean
The inevitable happened and one day in a particularly stressful situation one of them blurted. Out came the grief held in for months and they heard themselves giving voice to long held thoughts, slights and grievances. The damage was immense.
We managed to resolve the situation by dint of mediation and some assertive talking but it wasn’t easy and the wounds will take some time to heal.
How much better it would have been if either one of the parties had felt able to behave assertively, professionally and as an adult, and take some control.
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Posted on April 16th, 2012 by Jane